Customs Officers are quite tolerant these days, but they can still stop you when you are going
through the Green Channel and have nothing to declare. Even really honest people are often made
to feel guilty. The hardened professional smuggler, on the other hand, is never troubled by such
feelings, even if he has five hundred gold watches hidden his suitcase. When I returned from abroad
recently, a particularly officious young Customs Officer clearly regarded me as a smuggler.
'Have you anyting to declare?' he asked, looking me in the eye.
'No', I answered confidently.
'Would you mind unlocking this suitcase please?'
'Not at all,' I answered.
The Officer went through the case with great care. All the thing I had packed so carefully were soon
in a dreadful mess. I felt sure I would never be able to close the case again. Suddenly, I saw the
Officer's face light up. He had spotted a tiny bottle at the bottom of my case and he pounced on it
with delight.
'Perfume, eh?' he asked sarcastically. 'You should have declared that. Perfume is not exempt from
import duty;'
'But it isn't perfume,' I said. 'It's hair gel.' Then I added with a smile, 'It's a strange mixture
I make myself.'
As I expected, he did not believe me.
'Try it!' I said encouragingly.
The officer unscrewed the cap and put the bottle to his nostrils. He was greeted by an unpleasant
smell which convinced him that I was telling the truth. A few minutes later, I was able to hurry
away with percious chalk marks on my baggage.